Pleasure is an important component of happiness. It re-energizes, refreshes, and renews us after the hard work of life.  It gives us relief from thoughts about our stressors and it is a reward that gives us motivation to keep moving toward being our best.

In this first part of a 3-Part Series I will discuss the definition of pleasure and give an overview of ways to increase your pleasure.

What is Pleasure?

life-filled-with-pleasure

Pleasure is fleeting raw emotion that is brought on by social, environmental, and physical factors.  Happy social events such as parties, family dinners, and weddings give us pleasure.  Environments like Yosemite, a bustling San Francisco street, or Disneyland incite pleasure. Physical factors that create pleasure include eating vanilla ice cream, wrapping ourselves in a warm soft blanket, or receiving a hug from a friend.

We experience pleasure through our senses: sight, sound, touch, taste, smell. Pleasure is a Van Gogh painting, Diana Krahl’s velvet voice, a kitten’s soft fur, ripe strawberries, or the aroma of sweet lavender drifting on a spring breeze.

Unfortunately pleasure has a pitfall: it habituates easily. This means that if you imbibe in the same pleasure too much or too often, it has less positive impact on you.  I like to use the example of chocolate.  When you take the first bite of chocolate, you feel it melt in your mouth and you taste the bitter and the sweet. You may say, “hmmm.” In the subsequent bites, you are less conscious of the taste.

Another example is music. If you listened to Bruce Springsteen’s “Born to Run” 24 hours a day, it would not only loose its positive impact and but would probably become irritating.

So how can you increase your pleasure?

In Authentic Happiness Martin Seligman, Ph.D. gives some important strategies for increasing our pleasure:

  • Avoid habituating pleasure
    • Spread out your instances of pleasure
    • Enjoy a variety of pleasures
    • Savor pleasure
      • Be present and conscious
      • Sharpen your perceptions
      • Be absorbed in the experience
      • Share the experience and build memories of it
      • Anticipate pleasure

 

  • Be mindful
    • Slow down
    • Sense your surroundings
    • Meditate

Spreading Out the Instances of Pleasure

It’s easy to habituate pleasure.  We go to the same restaurant and eat the same thing, take the same route for our walk every day, listen to the same music, and play the same sport.

You can avoid habituating pleasure by spreading out the instances of it.   If you listened to “Born to Run” just once every Saturday morning, it would be enjoyable every time.

In my life I spread out pleasurable activities by only going to Pasta Al Dente restaurant once a month, walking a different route every day (and saving the Naples Canals for the weekend), and only reading “People” magazine on Sunday afternoons.

I want to challenge you to apply this Life Coaching tip to your life.  For the next month spread your pleasurable activities throughout your week, month, and year.

Look for Part 2 of this series on pleasure in which I will discuss other strategies for increasing your pleasure.
Image Courtesy : photostock/FreeDigitalphotos.net

work-life-balance

Feeling tired, overwhelmed, disengaged, directionless, or pulled in too many directions?  Working with a Life Coach can help.  Life is complicated. There are limitless options, a myriad of pressures, and an avalanche of information coming to us every day.

 

When I coach clients who come to me in a state of overload, I start by helping them determine what they can cut out or cut down, what they can delegate or pay someone else to do, and what can be scheduled for the future, to take the pressure off now.

 

We then clarify what their goals and priorities are in work and life. Once we identify this focus, we look at whether where they are spending their time truly aligns with their priorities.  In most cases, it doesn’t.

 

M.H., owner of the Long Beach based Infant Family Services, talks about the effect coaching has had on her life : “With you as my coach, I step back and think about what is really critical, and then I have a productive day.  I also make sure I get the rest I need.  I’m glad to be living a more balanced and focused life.”

 

Many clients who come to me say that health is a high priority for them, but often they spend zero time on maintaining their health.  Coaching can help you put action behind the goal of having good health.  Most of my clients create eating and exercise plans and they are able to stick to them because of the focus our regular discussions put on these goals.  Having a coach creates accountability for them to get the important things done.

 

S.S., a Global Supply Chain Vice President, is typical of coaching clients : “Life Coaching helped me get clear about what I want out of life.  Now I’m able to make a plan and stay on track   I’m able to keep moving, one step at a time, and persevere.  I’m finally living the life I’ve always wanted to live.”

 

Having an outside, unbiased expert to help you examine your life is invaluable.  We’re often too caught up in our day to day lives to spend any time thinking about how we can get what we want in life.

 

Regular coaching sessions are a time to create strategies to make your life meaningful, satisfying, and pleasant.  It’s a time to create a plan to attain success.  A time to think strategically and globally about your life. Coaching creates space for you to focus creatively on the big picture.

 

“I feel much more in control and on purpose.  I’ve been able to get in touch with what’s important to me and my family. Now I am living an examined life.“ R.V., Real Estate Entrepreneur/

 

People ask me, “Does everyone need a coach?” My answer is that anyone who wants to live life as well as they can and be the best they can be, will benefit greatly from working with a coach.

 

Image Courtesy : Stuart Miles/FreeDigitalphotos.net

 

 

Living in our frenetic “Information Cloud”, twitter-laden, blogospheric world, we often move from task to task, screen to screen, sound bite to sound bite, without ever stopping to smell the roses. We as human beings need to stop from time to time. And we need joyful moments to feed our hearts, souls, and minds.

“The experience of scent enriches, improves, and deepens our lives in multiplicative and multifaceted ways. Our sense of smell allows us to experience an intense emotional life, awakens our memories, is interlaced with our mental health, and triggers our passion. . . The use of scent to enhance our lives goes way back in history: . . . cavemen dragged pine and fir boughs into their caves.” –Rachel Herz, Scent of Desire

Smelling a pleasant scent can create a joyful moment and the small break we need to keep going. Whether you light a vanilla candle, take in the sweet scent of strawberries, stop to smell the ocean breeze or pine needles, or smell your loved ones’ hair, enjoying a pleasant scent takes no time and enriches your life. And you deserve this kind of break, at least once a day.

Scent can help you feel more grounded, present, and alive. It can nourish your spirit and lift you out of a stressful situation. It can shift your thinking from negative to positive thoughts.